On January 30th, I wrote a post that I was so nervous to share. I was worried of people’s perception as I tried to articulate my thoughts. However, I woke up this morning and remembered this post so clearly. I remembered it as I wished so badly there would be a shift in the world where we didn’t need to have any more discussions about work life balance and instead there would be a shift to just life. As a working mom, I always struggled with having big dreams and goals, while being a mom who is there for all the moments. I always felt like I was torn to have to choose. I prayed I could blend these two lives into one. It almost felt like I was living two lives. First 10 hours of my day was work, then the last 4 hours was being a mom, before I would go to bed or maybe have an hour to myself. Couldn’t work and life should be blended altogether. It is one life isn’t it?
What is crazy, is this pandemic has somewhat made this blend of work and life come true. Since COVID-19, I’ve been able to work from home. I am able to get all my work done, while having dinner simmering in the background. If I’m not in a ton of meetings, my kids are beside me, doing school work. If I have a ton of meetings, my parents are there to help. Through the midst of all this fear and uncertainty, I feel this weird sense of calm as I finally feel a balance and a flow. As opposed to a push and pull. I know I am considered extremely fortunate during this time to still be able to work and have support for my kids. I do not take this for granted at all, and even on those crappy days, I know how lucky and grateful I am.
This was the post written 9 weeks ago.
“CEO’s... some food for thought. .
Trust me when I say I love my job. I love coaching leaders and helping them create a more engaged workforce. I absolutely love doing emotional intelligence assessments and debriefs with employees to help them create stronger relationships and bring awareness to how they are showing up in times of conflict. I also feel so fortunate and love coaching entrepreneurs grow their brand and business. People that know me, knows that I can be a workaholic as I’ve lived most my adult life working full time with side businesses.
Trust me when I say I love being a mom. I love watching them grow and capturing these moments that make me feel like my heart is going to melt. I love how they have little personalities that make them unique to them. I love how much they need me but more so, how much I need them.
But when I’m at work I can’t help but think off all the things I need to do at home. Stressing that I have to leave work or the commute home will be crazy. Knowing I still have to get the kids and cook dinner at a reasonable time. I can’t help but feel guilty about the fact I am missing out on another school field trip or the fact I need to remember to book that dental appt. I can’t help but feel guilty that I’m working too much and my kids are growing so fast. I need to register my son in soccer and to make sure I remember to help Quentin find something to bring to show and tell that starts with a “G.”
But when I’m at home, I can’t help but think about the fact I forgot to respond to that email or book that meeting. I think about all the things I didn’t finish and all the things I still need to do after the kids go to bed. Whether it’s to log back into work or to prep for the day tomorrow. Don’t even get me started on the prep when I need to go on a work trip. I think about how much I could grow my career and business if I had the time. .
I find myself imagining a world where I could work whenever and wherever. I dream of a world where work life balance is truly valued, where organizations are inclusive, have empathy for people, and employees feel valued. Doesn’t matter what time of day or where.
I imagine a world where work from home and flexible work times/arrangements are the norm. I could wake up early and instead of commuting to work (which normally takes 45 min), I use that time to get through my emails. Then when the kids wake up, I could get them ready and feed them breakfast, in time to get them to school. Come home to take conference calls, work on my project, do more emails. Until I need a break, I could run upstairs and start the laundry. Continue with meetings, emails and conference calls with no distraction. Pick my kids up from school, prep dinner, hang out then bedtime. If needed, log back into work to get the last bit of the to do list done.
A day like this would mean complete focus and satisfaction that I’m able to focus knowing home and work and life is taken care of. I am able to fulfill my role as an entrepreneur, an employee and a mom.
I wouldn’t be at work worrying about home, and at home worrying about work. I am present. I feel engaged, fulfilled and balanced. My roles in life become one as opposed to two separate parts of my day where I could never feel balanced. I feel supported.
Being a working mom is no joke. And sometimes grace and flexibility is needed.
Working moms, do you hear me? I sure hope change is on the horizon. “
So that was my post. My dreams put out there in the world. No, I didn’t think a pandemic would create such a situation, but I choose to look at the positive during a time that can be so negative.
I pray COVID-19 will end soon and can appreciate the uncertainty, fear, anxiety all around us. However, what I hope comes out of this is some change in the world. As new relationships have been built, communities have pulled together, the strong push to support small businesses, corporations become more flexible, parents are more present and life can be a bit more simple.
I also hope you are all staying safe, healthy and happy.